I'm starting to regain focus, and understand my purpose. The purpose of this year, this blog, my life, and where I'm headed.
The purpose of this blog, is not her, although she was the start of the blog, that led me to this point. I thank her for that, and I needed that. I've now started to realize, this blog is not about her, it is about me. It's about my future, my life, and the changes I want to make. For the better of me, regardless of her.
I want to make these changes for me. And for whoever I am with in the future. I want to be able to be the best boyfriend, husband, and father that I can be. Whether it's her, or someone else. I want to be happy, for me, without anyone else. I want to have a purpose, and focus in my life, without anyone else. I want to understand myself, and be able to control myself. If I cannot be happy alone, and love myself, I cannot ever offer myself to someone else. I cannot love someone else. That is the point.
I have to have an open mind, and an optimistic outlook towards the future. I do not know what the future holds. I can only live, and control the present time. I cannot look back at the past anymore, and wonder where the mis-steps were. I already know where they were. Analyzing them anymore, is just over-kill, and distracts me from my goals. The past is in the past, it is what it is. I have to accept that I cannot change anything that happened, and even if I could, would it really have changed anything? No one will ever know. I have to continue waking up each day, living it to the fullest, and being who I want to be each day. It's baby steps, but it's getting me to where I need to be. Each day I wake up with a new focus, stronger desire, feeling new and refreshed.
365 Days for Love is about ME. Re-gaining my focus, for my future. For a new and better me. I am genuine. I am real. I am me. That is all that I can be.
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