Over the past several months I've learned some things about money. I'm not ever going to be rich, and I don't really ever want to be rich. I only want to be successful in what I do, and be able to live comfortably. Right now I'm living, and getting by but not comfortably. Once I become a Nurse that will change, but that is a long ways off at this point.
I've realized money is not the most important thing in this world. The most important things in this world are free. Money cannot buy you happiness, never has, never will. It can by you things to try to fill the void in your life, but it cannot buy you happiness.
In our relationship, I was often selfish when it came to money; and I'm sure I often used it as a way to control things. It wasn't right. She didn't have very much money, due to working part time and going to school full time. I didn't have very much money either, because my job doesn't pay much. We mostly lived on my money. She took care of her personal bills, I took care of mine and the rent. There were times where I could have helped her more, when I did sometimes have money available, and I never offered. I was selfish, and rude. She's helped me more times than I can count when I've needed a little extra money just to get through the week, or brought me groceries when my fridge was empty. She also paid for our whole Vegas trip last year, spent several thousands of dollars, we had a blast. It was a quick trip, and it's easty to forget how much money was spent.
She was going through one of the msot stressful times of her life, and I wasn't supportive of her. That's what she wanted most, was support. Instead we often ended up in fights about our finances and how tight money was. She wasn't trying to take my money from me, I wasn't trying to take her money from her. We were both just stressed out and very financially stressed. Last year was a very hard year financially for both of us.
Our rent always got paid, and we never starved. Our power never got shut off. Things got rough sometimes, but we always some how made it to the next payday.
Money is really not worth fighting over. You either have it or you don't; if you don't; there's no point in fighting about it. In a relationship you have to work together as a team, and support each other. Even when life gets stressful, and the going gets tough, you have to be strong and staycalm. Arguing about it just made the situation more stressful, tore us apart, and pitted us against each other.
I wish I had realized this sooner.
I'm trying to help and support her now as much as I can.
Luckily she's still my friend.
Money will come and money will go. Money is not everything.
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